Every single working day for the past 5 years, I saw her face smile at me. She would remind me with humor, on why we do the things we do in that school. She reminded me that she saw me and my value. I keep thinking about this tid bit, because do we as humans really notice those we interact with daily and the treasure it is, in the ability to do so? The truth is, we haven’t a clue the imprint they have on our hearts until they are gone.
Gone is such a vast empty space. Deep as an ocean, we try to make sense of it. My heart is so heavy. I feel so fragile in the space of the unknown.
Today I looked at her face while I knelt by her casket. She looked nothing like who she was. A vacant body doesn’t hold the vibrant joy a soul saturates the world like she did! I admired the kindness coin she held her hand. It truly signified the being she was. I will miss her.
Sudden death of someone is such a core ripping of betrayal in life. It is also matched with the biggest life lesson of: don’t you dare wait! Seize the moment! Be grateful you woke up this morning because someone who was a beautiful light in this cold harsh world, didn’t.
I need to get used to saying good morning to someone else at school. I don’t want to. I’m angry and sad I have too. However, I will, while making sure I take the time to look them in the eye. I will tell them how much I value them. I’ll joke about how crazy middle school is, while we all love our school family hard.
Welcome to the next place. They are lucky to have you. I am sure you will get a homecoming of a lifetime.
I look forward to saying good morning to you again some day- spirit to spirit. At the place we all long to be, while numb to knowing any better. Where there is no vastness of separation and nothing is gone forever. For now, my heart misses you.
“Be Free”,I pray, “Go with open arms- Good morning”.
seekingup
Seeking Up 
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