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Archive for October, 2011

Sometimes it is the small things we forget to be thankful and we take for granted.

Months ago hurricane Irene came through the east coast and it stunned us all. It was the first time in years we went without power for more than a day. Luckily at that time it was still the Summer months and we had the ability to sleep, play outside, and cook on the grill. Even in times of losing groceries, living by candlelight, and so forth, there were still some silver linings. One mainly being, it wasn’t Winter.

Suddenly this past weekend, we got hit by a freak winter storm prior to Halloween, that dumped an estimated 14 inches on our little town. Our state wasn’t ready for this, and our trees still had a ton of leaves on them which made them heavy. Needless to say, we entered a mad house state of emergency. For all the complaining we did months ago during the hurricane, it bares as comparison. Now we are without heat and electricity. Trees down, power lines down, and there is no door to door trick or treating. It was so bad we had to take the 2 1/2 hour drive to seek refuge in Rhode Island.

As if the prognosis couldn’t get worse, the damage is so bad that the estimated time frame for power to come back on is 8-10 days! School has been out for two days already–TWO SNOW DAYS to make up before HALLOWEEN. And many many people are without warmth, hot water, and a place to seek refuge in.

For today take a moment out to be thankful for the small things provided to us that we use everyday and forget about. The things we take for granted daily, and need.

I had a moment of weakness yesterday when we considered staying home in the cold. I could not help but weep. The idea of staying with two kids at home in the cold, darkness was overwhelming. I failed to find a silver lining and wept in it.

Today I am thankful to have family close enough to come to. I am thankful for a warm bed to sleep in, hot water to bathe in, food to eat, lights on, and the ability to make this Halloween a memorable one for my kids by trick or treating with family.

I am also greatly appreciative of the mounds of workers putting their lives on the line in order to get our state back up and running.

Meanwhile, I ask of you, while being thankful for the little things, to send your prayers to those who are not as lucky as I am. Who have no choice but to sleep in a cold, dark home. I wept in a day, never mind 8-10 days.

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TV Show Time Change

In case you are planning to tune in… My debut on I Survived Beyond & Back has been pushed back a week! It will be on NOv 6 10pm est on the BIO channel! NOT this weekend the 30th! Hope you’ll watch it and let me know what you think of it!

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Go Live

A year ago if you told me I would be featured on tv telling my secret I would have said “Never”. If you told me I would run a 5K I would have said “With this fat behind?–NEVER”. Or told me I would attend a writers conference in NYC I would have said “….I’m just a blogger, a published writer-Never”.

The thing about the word never is the more you put it out in the universe the more you are holding yourself back from the living the best life you could lead. What about making a vital attempt to think about all of the things you always dreamed of having the courage to do, and changing the nevers into “I’ll try”.

I think with age we all get less whimsical and more fearful. We can’t imagine putting ourselves out there and looking like a fool. We limit ourselves with our on limitations.

There is no other person in this world holding you back other than yourself.

Think about this. NO ONE.

So when you are in the moment of “never” and about to cruise into the “because so and so…” you need to stop in your tracks, point your thumbs to yourself, and think about the change you are willing to make happen. If you are unwilling and would like to live your life in the confines of your own built walls–press on. However, if you dare to live your life fully, purposely, and less predictable, try the things that you fear you may fail at. It may just show you your own strength, the most important life lessons, and be the very thing you are meant to live your life through.

I am going to be on tv with my best kept secret unfolded. I ran a 5K regardless of my size. I went to a conference ALONE about writing, and starting to write a book. All in less than six months I have grasped three things I told myself I could never do–and I DID!

You can to. You just need to tell yourself it can happen.Allow your self to break free of the walls you built. Blame others less, and take responsibility for your own life.

Go Live.

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Intention

There is something to be said for being new to this game. Living my life in my truth, and pursuing my true calling. It sounds so easy/breezy, rainbows and love but really it is hard work.

For one, not everyone is open to it. Also I need to question my motives when reaching out, and keeping my ego in check. Not that I think I am better than anyone that never had a near-death experience, I just think when something spiritual major happens in your life you need to be aware of intention.

I have been struggling with this a lot lately. I have reached out way to many time to people who didn’t ask for it. Clearly I need to send myself a memo stating that not everyone that loses a loved one wants to be comforted by my experience or here how awesome heaven is.

I was handed a piece of humble pie unintentionally when I reunited with an old friend that is sick. I thought I would “help” her when in reality it was God’s way of saying “Aimee it isn’t ABOUT YOU”. My friend taught me WAY more than I taught her. She was absolutely God intended. I have since realized that ones ego can really talk you into making yourself look a fool. Every time I open my mouth to tell of my blessed experience I need to meditate on it and think “What is your intention? Is this about you?”

I was sitting at the park meditating/praying. A very open space for the public to see me full-out crisscrossed legs, palms up, and eyes closed. I am sure people saw me. For a moment I thought “I live in this town–I can’t do this”, and then I thought–what am I doing –praising God? What is embarrassing about that?

More often than not you will see me drive these days with the blinding sun in my eyes because I refuse to put down the sun visor. I drink it all in. The light only fuels your light. You will also find me often driving with a “palm up”. Sounds weird–I know. However–I assure you it is a way to accept light into yours. It is a mere reminder to live my day in light –through light–in God’s love.

I am unaware on where I am going after my truth airs on national tv. All that I do know is I no longer have to live my life a lie. I can outwardly be the best Aimee I was meant to be.

I have a lot of questions that God keeps answering through people. Just this past week Oprah’s LifeClass debuted and I nearly could keep my head above the lake of thankful tears it brought down my face. Just when I thought I couldn’t have found better tv–Miss O tops it with a flat-out riveting documentary called “Wake Up”. I knew there was a purpose for me watching it, and I walked away feeling even more confident in my truth.

I still get “Like Oprah” when I pray for what my purpose is. At one time in my life I might have thought this voice telling me this meant I would be a millionaire or be famous. I would have run with my ego and thought my life couldn’t be better. However–now I am a better seeker. A better believer. I know my “Like Oprah” is more about being a vehicle of God’s love. She and I have that in common. Today I am more proud of that, then anything else Oprah might have. We are walking similar paths, in very different ways.

I am so thankful for signs. So thankful God continues to bless me with the ability to see and read them. While holding new life this weekend I couldn’t help but think about the importance of be thankful. I also couldn’t help but think about our focus needs to shift on being purposeful and well intended.

I am new at this game. However, I am sure thanks to God’s will, I am going to be a winner at it.

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Awaiting

Today is full of blessing to be found, just as any other.

I took a moment flying on my way home to CT from FL to look out over the clouds and thank God. Just as I had in the ocean the day before, and on my run amongst palm trees the day before that. When you take time to count your blessings it really lifts you up to stop and take note just how fortunate you are.

As if my list of blessing couldn’t expand any bigger…. it is about to. The very best kind of blessings. NEW LIFE!

Every time I hear of new life it nearly makes me weep. Even when it is just a friend of a friend, or someone I see on Facebook. I am sure you are wondering why a new baby that I will never even meet would bring me to my knees? because it is the best reminder of life and God. The beauty and the understanding of our existence all wrapped up in a little swaddled baby burrito.

New life is joyous.

My one and only sister is about to have her second baby. My sister who has been my biggest cheerleader and defender (even though I spent at least 6 years of my life telling on her every move) is about to bring new life. A swaddled baby burrito I can not wait to hold. A true, hands on, all loving blessing to remind us all of God’s glory.

I am just sitting awaiting the word thinking just when I thought today couldn’t get any better, that there was nothing else I could thank God for…. it is coming.

Blessings are endless. Awaiting them is the hard part.

Make time to be thankful. Your gratitude shall be endless.

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Thanks Be To God

Normally I use moment alone doing things us Moms never get to do. Like grocery shop alone, or go sit in Starbucks drinking a coffee while reading US Weekly. However, this day, this time, I did something different.

It was a beautiful day. Very New England Fall. The colors of the trees were bright,the weather cool enough for a light jacket. I decided I wanted to be part of the day and take a walk. That I needed to seize that day, and swallow it up.

I walked a very long walk. I listened to inspiring music. I sat on benches and took in sunshine. I smiled at small toddling babies learning how to walk and trying to stay up. All while doing what I never seem to have time to do at this time of day… Pray.

I feel it in my core that I am about to climb a spiritual mountain. That soon it will all make sense to me. That my “what is my life’s purpose?”–is about to be revealed.

Sharing my near-death experience to the world is a re-birth. I no longer feel alone in it. I have had many many people reach out to me in the past few days offering a great deal of support. People it is clear God intended me to meet or reconnect with. I am seeing this world through brand new eyes. Eyes that speak my truth, and 100% me.

I can’t stop crying.

I have been crying at everything and anything. It is a lot to process, a lot to take in. I am not crying in sadness but in gratitude.

I got to tell my truth.
I am not alone in it.

I am excited for what is to come. While praying and walking, and taking time to take in the light, I could not stop thanking God.

Thanks be to God.

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The deepest part of my soul is making me sick to my stomach right now. What an enormous day for everything I stand for! It is about to be trumped in a few weeks with the “actual day”.

Today I received a message on Facebook that a friend saw my commercial. Huh? Yes even I was surprised. Since, I have watched in about 7,986 times. Not for vanity reasons (because heck the tv DOES add 10 lbs which is especially sad when you have about 30 you already have to lose), but simply for the surreal feeling that this is actually happening.

I actually admitted to the world my deepest “LIGHTEST” secret. That I have died, went to Heaven, and came back.

There I was on a well-known network. The BIO channel only tells the truth. And I was now part of their fact.

I also saw the web exclusive and nearly passed out. Oddly enough my biggest worry wasn’t how I looked on camera (because quite frankly I could have used some more make-up, better hair, and a month of Jillian Michaels!) but the way people who know me would react to my story.

It is so very difficult to put your truth out there. It is completely gut wrenching to share something so special, spiritual, and all of my being with the world. There will be many nay sayers, and people close to me that will think it is false. However, I know my truth, God knows my truth, what else needs to be proven?

I am still human. I still worry. Will my neighbors be whispering when they walk by my house? Will the parents at my kid’s school think I read tarot cards and crystal balls? And the list goes on.

Part of sharing your inner most you is being most vulnerable to others. Most people don’t share their inner most being with the world. It is nerve-racking.

So here I am. Trying to keep my national tv ego in check, while wondering where I am going to go from here.

It is a story I lived all my life to tell.

I am not sure where this tv ride will take me, but I know one thing is for sure: my truth has set me free.

I was granted this gift by the One & Only.
Seeking up seeks answers.

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